I'm Just Sayin'

I'm on the road for a few days. First stop...Memphis, Tennessee. I can't hardly wait. That's Southern for "Id rather be somewhere else" or "I'd rather be doing something else." My wife and I left Memphis about 6 years ago and we've never looked back, but we still have family there so what are we to do? Memphis , I've said this before, smells like fried chicken and diesel fuel. Maybe not literally but in the figurative sense... it has the only bridge over the Mississippi River for miles up and down that big ole ugly,  muddy drainage ditch. I-40 traffic is constant..day and night and a large percentage of that traffic is trucks...big rigs..16 wheelers. Hence..diesel fuel is a major commodity there. As for the fried chicken...I don't have the numbers on this but I'd bet the barn that the per capita consumption is the highest in the country. Then of course there is the BBQ. This is the one thing..besides my family, that I miss with regards to Memphis. No where in the world can even come close to the quality and quantity of BBQ. At least if we're talkin' pork BBQ... and in Memphis we are talkin' pork BBQ. They will look at you real funny, with head slightly cocked and a little smirk on their face if you walk up and order beef BBQ. They have it, but it's just for the tourists.

Memphis has two tourist attractions. There is Beale Street, a revitalized section of downtown that Memphis uses to draw in music fans...Blues fans specifically. And one can hear some great Blues there. I love the Blues. I grew up with the Blues and I guess it is one more thing I miss from Memphis. I've done a lot of drinkin' in the clubs on Beale Street...Blues sounds even better if you are shit faced. Maybe that's why it been so long since I've heard any really good Blues. I quit drinkin'.

The other tourist attraction is Graceland. Everybody in the world knows that Elvis lived in Memphis. Whenever I mention Memphis...my association with Memphis, invariably I am asked if I have ever been to Graceland. I've seen Graceland...I looked but I didn't go in.  Probably most of Memphis has only gone to Graceland...paid and taken the Graceland tour...when they are hosting friends from out of town. The closest I've come to "going to Graceland" was going to the Elvis Car Museum. It's across the street from the house. I went to a wedding reception there. I know that almost sounds vulgar, but it's the truth. I must mention one thing about Elvis that is not an exaggeration or just plain folk lore...the fried peanut butter and banana sandwich. Those things are out of this world and they are easy to make. Use white bread. I'm not sure of the brand that Elvis used, but it must be white bread and not the thin sliced kind. Use plenty on peanut butter, add a sliced  banana...sliced long ways, then some mayonnaise and then...this is important, you fry the thing in an iron skillet with butter. Fry both sides and serve with a Coke. It'll make you hips shake and your knees rattle.

Times up...I'm late hittin' the road. Next stop...Memphis, Tennessee.